Kingdom of Silk

Kingdom Shifter Series

Book 4

Quinn Loftis

Copyright © 2025 by Quinn Loftis Books LLC

All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

For all of those who don’t like spiders, but read it anyways.

Contents

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Epilogue

Acknowledgments

About the Author

Quinn’s Bookshelf

Prologue

“There have been times in my life when I really needed to evaluate my life choices. This is definitely one of those times. Although if I evaluate them right now, I’m going to realize how dumb I’ve been and then I’ll be depressed. Depression and being wrapped up in a giant ass spider web just doesn’t seem like a good time.” ~ Maddie

Maddie surfaced from a darkness that clung to her like thick oil, her mind slow to unscramble from dreams that felt much too real. She blinked, but the blackness didn’t lift. For a split second, she wondered if she’d gone blind, or if she was still dreaming—caught somewhere between waking and a nightmare. The air was thick—damp, earthy, with an undertone of something sharp and sweet that made her think of overripe grapes and old magic.

Wait. Why on earth would she know what magic smells like? Did magic have a smell? It must or she wouldn’t have just conjured that thought up out of her butt. Maybe her brain was shutting down from being tightly wrapped up in the sticky web and it was causing her thoughts to be completely irrational.

“Or hell, magic just might have a smell,” she muttered to herself.

She tried to move but that simply was not an option. Her arms, her legs, her waist—everything was wrapped, pinned, immobilized. Her cheek was mashed against warmth and muscle, and a familiar, smoky scent threaded through the sour air.

Roan.

Memories crashed in: she was supposed to be meeting the other shamans—her first diplomatic mission as a potential new shaman, the first human. Roan had insisted they start with the Kingdom of Silk, and she’d wondered why, though he wouldn’t say. He’d only told her that Lyric, Silk’s shaman, knew to expect them.

She remembered the journey to the vineyard estate: endless rows of grapevines marching across rolling hills, their leaves heavy with dew and fruit. Spider webs hung between the vines, glistening silver in the sun. Roan had explained, “Webs keep the bugs off the grapes. And it’s very effective.” Maddie had found it beautiful and unsettling, the way the webs shimmered and trembled in the wind.

Roan had been even quieter than usual as they approached the manor house—a sprawling, elegant structure that was in complete contrast to the black curtains that framed the inside of the windows. Its balcony windows were open and the rich fabric flowed out from the slight breeze beckoning them to enter—if they dared. As they stepped through the stunning double doors, the air in the entry hall was cool and sweet, carrying the faint perfume of pressed grapes and polished wood. Everything was dark. The floor was a polished ebony marble. The walls a deep, rich shade of red. The wooden rail of the massive staircase was a dark mahogany, as was all the wood that framed the entryways to other rooms. As her eyes gazed at the dark opulence, she couldn’t help but feel like the bright exterior of the mansion was a trick to invite and gain the trust of a person to get them to enter. A beautiful trap, much like the glistening, crystal-like threads of a spider’s web.

A servant with an inhumanly smooth gait greeted them. Dressed in a simple black dress buttoned up to the neck with three-quarter length sleeves and a skirt that hit just below the knee, the servant led them through marble-floored corridors lined with paintings of silk-draped royalty and shadowy forests. Maddie’s nerves buzzed with every step, eyes flicking to the corners where she noticed webs clung to the red walls. As beautiful as the place was, the spider webs made the “creep” factor go through the roof.

“We’ll wait for the king and queen in the sunroom,” the servant said, voice as soft as velvet. “Lyric will join you shortly.”

“There’s a sunroom?” Maddie asked, as her eyes widened.

The servant blinked at her.

“I just mean, well, this,” Maddie stumbled, motioning to the atmosphere around them, “doesn’t exactly scream sunny relaxation.”

Maddie wandered to the sunroom’s glass wall. The ceiling was black, which somehow made the light even more illuminating. She marveled at the view of the vineyard beyond, the way sunlight caught on the webs strung between the trellises, painting the air with rainbows. Roan stood nearby, arms folded, gaze never straying from the door.

Lyric didn’t come. Instead, a different servant appeared, in the same black dress the other had worn—her smile sharp, her eyes too dark. “Would you like a tour of the house while you wait? The king is very proud of the new cellars and our silkworks.”

Roan hesitated, but Maddie, eager to see more, agreed. They followed the servant through winding halls, past rooms full of delicate glass and ancient books, down a twisting staircase that led to a long corridor lined with black silk-draped windows. That’s when the ambush came without warning.

One moment, Maddie was at the banister, admiring its intricate webwork, despite its creepiness, marveling at how the strands sparkled like diamonds. Next, something cold and sticky wrapped around her arms, pinning them to her sides so fast she barely had time to gasp.

Roan spun, a snarl on his lips, magic sparking at his fingertips. The servant’s face twisted, her true nature revealed—black eyes, too many joints in her fingers. Giant legs exploded from her hips, her legs simply disappeared. From the waist up, she remained in ‌human form, except for an “otherness” that seemed to cling to her. Then, more spider-people stepped from the shadows, their faces masked and unreadable. Their legs moved in the icky way that spiders did, making her cringe.

Maddie tried to fight, but another strand of silk whistled through the air, yanking her feet out from under her. Roan surged forward, fighting like a cornered wolf, but the numbers overwhelmed him. One of the soldiers cracked him across the temple with a web-wrapped staff. Maddie’s scream echoed off the stone walls as Roan crumpled, his eyes rolling back, and then the world snapped to black.

Now, in the pitch dark, her breath stuttered shallow—panic clawing high in her throat. Maddie didn’t enjoy feeling trapped. She didn’t like her limbs being restrained, and with every shallow inhale she felt the panic rising higher and higher. She was in a full-body straightjacket courtesy of some overgrown mutant arachnid. Of all the ways she’d imagined dying, “spider shifter’s lunch special” had not made the bucket list. She tried to cling to the humor of that morbid thought, attempting to calm herself and not have a panic attack that would in no way help the situation.

Closing her eyes and centering herself with slower breaths, she focused on the warm and solid presence pressed to her cheek. His breath rising and falling with a slow, steady rhythm. At least she wasn’t alone in her spider straightjacket. Maddie let out a shaky breath—well, as much as she could with her face mashed into his chest and a mouthful of dust and questionable spider residue. The steady thump beneath her ear grounded her. Roan was alive. They both were. At least for now.

“If I suffocate in here, I’d like my tombstone to read, ‘She died as she lived: mouthy and stuck to the wrong guy,’” she muttered, voice muffled against him.

“You’re not suffocating,” he finally replied, his voice a scratchy whisper, rough edges softened by exhaustion. “You’re just panicking. Breathe slower, and deeper. And how many ‘wrong guys’ have you been with?” There was a bite to his tone that made Maddie want to retreat from him, but since she was literally stuck to him, that wasn’t an option.

“Oh, I’m panicking?” She tried for flippant, but her words wobbled. “I thought maybe I was having an allergic reaction to all this . . . ambiance. And my dating life is not up for discussion.”

He let out a slow exhale that stirred the hair at her temple. “On that, we’ll have to agree to disagree. Rest assured, Nushawani, it will be up for discussion.” The command was gentle, but left no room for argument.

That was too bad for him because Maddie didn’t do commands. Especially not from a man. Was she a raging feminist? Not-exactly. She’d been raised by a strong, independent woman who’d done just fine with no male persuasion in her life. And Maddie could do the same. And she sure as hell would not be told what she had to discuss with someone she’d known for only a couple of weeks.

“As charming as that invitation is,” she said in her sweetest voice, “I'm going to decline politely.”

“Whatever you need to tell yourself to feel like you’re the one in control,” Roan said, his voice deep and calm. As if she hadn’t just shut him down cold. “Now, if you could just hold that sharp tongue of yours for a moment and let me think.”

Her frustration rose as she struggled against the bindings. Now, not only was she feeling claustrophobic, she was feeling a tad homicidal.

If she didn’t talk, she’d scream. If she screamed, she’d probably choke on her own spit and die, which would be embarrassing, even for her. The webbing was everywhere. She had to focus on something other than the panic rising, and as Roan shifted, she realized her chest was pressed so tightly to him she could count the steady, unhurried thud of his heart. The scent of him—smoke, sweat, magic—cut through the rot and silk. And dang he did smell good. How had she not noticed that before they’d been forced together by psychopathic spiders who were probably going to eat them? And how had she not noticed how firm his chest was? Despite the small size of her girls, they were soft, especially compared to him. For some reason, this made her want to press closer to him. Which simply pissed her off more. Being mad was good. That meant she wasn’t focused on being scared. So, Maddie let herself run with the anger.

“Since we’re on the train of ‘I’m going to speak my mind whether or not you want to hear it,’ I would like to point out that this is sort of your fault.” Okay, had that made her sound like a petulant child? A tad. But, he’d ordered her to discuss the guys she’d dated. Joke’s on him, Maddie didn’t date.

“Right,” Roan said, his tone bored. “Because I made the spiders attack us and wrap us in their butt floss.”

“I’m sorry, what did you just say?” Maddie’s voice rose a notch.

“I don’t repeat myself.”

Maddie’s mouth dropped open, but then snapped closed when she remembered he couldn’t see her look of outrage. “When you say things like ‘wrap us in their butt floss,’ you most certainly repeat yourself, sir. And you explain.”

Roan let out a huff that was half exasperation, half the beginnings of a laugh, though he did seem to do his best to smother it. “Spider silk comes out of their—look, do you really want the anatomy lesson right now, Nushawani?”

“Honestly, I’d take an anatomy lesson over the existential dread I’m currently experiencing,” Maddie shot back, rolling her eyes though he couldn’t see it. “And for the record, ‘Nushawani’ sounds like a disease you get from licking subway handrails.”

She felt his chest move under her cheek, like he was trying not to laugh. “I already told you, it means ‘new Shaman’ in our language.”

Maddie went quiet for a second, letting that settle over her. She’d been surprised at what the word meant, simply because when Roan called her that, it sounded more like an endearment. She would not admit that she’d been disappointed. “Still sounds like a disease.”

He said nothing, but she could feel the way his body relaxed just a little.

A heavy silence settled between them. Somewhere to their left, something skittered across stone. Maddie tensed, even as Roan pressed a little closer—as if he couldn’t help but want to protect her despite how badly she seemed to irritate him. She tried not to let hope trickle in. Maybe if they were quiet, the spider folk would forget about them entirely, and they’d just rot here, cocooned together for all eternity. Romantic.

Minutes—or hours, it was impossible to tell—slipped by. Maddie’s mind wandered, unwilling and wild: back to Lola and Katy. Were they alive? Had they stopped Azure? Maddie swallowed hard, guilt and fear tangling in her chest. If anything had happened to them—

The cocoon suddenly shuddered. Maddie froze. A sliver of light—faint, gold, and sticky-sweet—slipped in as a spider folk attendant, silent as breath, eased open a seam in the webbing. The small amount of light allowed Maddie to see that the attendant had slid a small vial through the gap, the glass sticky with nectar that glowed faintly in the dark.

Maddie leaned back and could see Roan’s face, and it was as if she’d forgotten how handsome he was. His rugged beauty was a bit of a shock after having been in the dark. Swirling silver eyes that nearly glowed stared down at her, full of questions she couldn’t quite decipher. His angular jaw was clenched as his full lips were drawn tight across his face. His brow furrowed deep as he continued to stare at her.

“For nourishment,” the attendant whispered, voice both kind and inhuman. She indicated the vial.

“Me first,” Roan barked. His voice felt like a slap. “If that’s poisonous, my body will be able to handle it better than yours,” he explained.

“Thanks,” Maddie said dryly. “Because I really want to be cocooned next to a dead body.” Why was she annoyed that he was actually protecting her and not simply demanding the first drink because he was an asshat?

“Your faith in me is touching,” Roan said, before the vial touched his lips and tilted ever so slightly.

After at least a minute of staring at the shaman, waiting to see if his head would explode or blood would ooze from his eyes, ears, and nose, Roan declared it safe for Maddie.

The servant placed it to her lips so Maddie could sip. The nectar tasted like honey and something wild, a jolt of energy threading through her limbs. She grimaced but drank until it was empty. Although she felt an odd sense of satisfaction, like the feeling after eating a meal, she didn’t feel any extra strength. She just felt nourished.

“I guess this means they don’t want us dead yet. Perhaps they want to fatten us up before they eat us,” Maddie said, her sarcasm a flimsy shield.

The attendant didn’t respond. The seam was sealed, and they were left in the stifling dark once more.

Maddie licked her lips. “How long do you think they’re planning on keeping us as human cocoons?”

Roan’s tone was flat. “Honestly, I have no clue why they took us to begin with. They have to know this will start a war between them and Kingdom of Claw. Whatever KOS’s reason is, it must be worth risking the wrath of Taras and other rulers.”

“Comforting. You know, I really thought the diplomatic slash religious life would have more wine tastings and fewer death threats.”

He snorted. “There’s much more to it than diplomacy and guiding. We enforce the rules. When Damarians don’t appreciate those rules, they get ticked off with the shaman. We might get a few death threats from the stupid ones.”

That made Maddie pause. She turned her head as much as she could, pressing her forehead deeper into his chest. “What does that mean for me? I’m a human. How could I possibly add any sort of help to your cause and abilities?”

He was quiet for a long time. “It means you’re a new bridge, between magic and people—humans. And between kingdoms. I believe you’re supposed to balance out this new dynamic we have been placed in. Keep the peace when you can. Fight when you can’t.” Roan’s arm shifted, pressing her closer. “Whatever your role, Maddie, it’s important. A shaman can shape the future of a kingdom. Or break it.”

She snorted. “No pressure.”

He was silent again, and Maddie could almost feel the storm churning inside him. She wondered just how much Roan was holding back, if it was anger, or fear, or something else—something tangled up in all those times he’d hovered too close, or glared at anyone who dared look at her twice, or snapped at her for getting five feet ahead on their journey.

“So, the Kingdom of Venom,” she prompted. “Is it true they drink blood and eat their young, or was that just a rumor?”

Roan let out a sharp sound. “Where’d you hear that?”

“I didn’t. I’m just trying to make conversation,” Maddie grinned to herself. It was a little too fun getting under his skin.

“Every kingdom has its rotten apples, just like humans. The bad apple in KOV just happened to have a lot of power. Azure’s ambition nearly destroyed the balance between the kingdoms. And considering the mess we’ve found ourselves in, he actually might have succeeded. I don’t know if he was successful in killing Katy, using her to finish making the human women into animi.”

“Yeah, well, thanks for the reminder.” Maddie’s mind caught again on Lola and Katy and their own predicament. The two girls whose pain she’d felt like it was her own. She closed her eyes, fighting the emotions. “We should have gone with them. You could have helped. We could have waited for this whole ‘new shaman dog show’ until after Azure was taken care of.”

Roan’s voice turned rough. “We have no idea how your powers are going to manifest. In a stressful situation like having your best friends' lives at risk, you could go volatile and accidentally kill someone.”

“True, but I hate not knowing if they’re okay,” she muttered.

He was silent for a heartbeat, then, “They will be. Gage will allow no other outcome, nor will Callon. Any male worth his salt would do everything in his power to protect his female and everyone she holds dear. Just as I will protect you, even from yourself.”

His words sent heat racing up her neck, anger, and something softer mingling in her chest. “You’re bossy, you know that? Overbearing, annoying, and incredibly frustrating.”

“You’re reckless, stubborn, and impossible to reason with,” Roan shot back, but his tone was warm.

Maddie grinned in the dark. “So, we’re even.”

The hours dragged on in the sticky dark, Maddie’s anxiety and Roan’s brooding presence filling the silence between their banter. Every so often, Maddie would ask a question—about the other kingdoms, about magic, about what shamans actually did—and Roan would answer, sometimes with a word, sometimes with a grunt, never with the whole truth. He was a puzzle she wanted to solve and a throat punch she wanted to give in equal measure. Had one arm not been wrapped behind him and one arm shoved between them, she probably would have tried a throat punch.

At one point, Maddie asked, “Why did you really bring me to Silk first?”

Roan hesitated. “Lyric’s a female shaman. I thought . . . you’d be more comfortable.”

She huffed. “Great call, boss. Ten out of ten, would not recommend.”

He grunted, but she could feel the tension in him, the way he held her even tighter, as if he could shield her from the world by sheer will alone.

Sometime later, the darkness grew heavier, and Maddie’s eyelids began to droop. She fought sleep, afraid of the dreams that might come, afraid of what might happen if she let go.

Roan’s voice, soft but iron-edged, cut through her drowsiness. “Get some sleep, Nushawani. I’ll keep watch.”

She wanted to argue, but his tone brokered no debate. She let herself relax, just a little, surrounded by the warmth of him, the comfort of his stubborn presence.

For the first time since they’d been cocooned, Maddie felt almost safe. She drifted toward sleep, the sound of Roan’s heartbeat steady in her ear, and wondered—just for a moment—if maybe, just maybe, he cared about her as much as she was starting to care about him.

Roan listened to Maddie’s slow breathing, felt the tension bleed out of her muscles as sleep finally claimed her. He didn’t let himself relax, not for a second. His mind raced—calculating, planning, listening for every scrape of claw and whisper of silk in the dark.

He hated this. Hated being helpless, hated not being able to fight his way out or protect her if not with magic than with brute strength. Maddie was infuriating—a force of nature, all sharp edges and stubborn pride—but she was his to protect. Even if she’d never admit she needed it.

He glanced down at the top of her head, feeling something twist in his chest—a sensation he’d only started experiencing since she crashed into his life. He’d never wanted a serious relationship. Not with anyone. He’d always told himself that if it wasn’t something as pure and wild and true as what the Damarian shifters had with their mates, then he didn’t want it. He’d seen what half-measures did to a man—and to a woman. He’d watched his own parents destroy each other, a slow unraveling that ended in bitterness and blood. He’d sworn he’d never even try, unless it was that kind of forever.

Then Maddie had shown up—blunt, reckless, infuriatingly stubborn, and so alive it made his teeth ache. At first, she was just another responsibility. The new shaman. The Nushawani. His job was to protect her, nothing more. But the longer he’d spent with her, the more she’d wormed her way under his skin. The more she’d filled up the quiet places inside him with her laughter, her endless questions, her wild courage.

He could remember the exact moment it hit him. It wasn’t the first time he’d seen her in the diner. His attention had been so focused on Lola, because it had been obvious she was an animus, that he just hadn’t given her a second thought. Not until he’d shown up at Lola’s house in hopes of keeping Callon in control. It had been like a punch to the gut. He’d never wanted anyone the way he wanted her. Never wanted anything to matter this much.

And it scared the hell out of him.

He didn’t know how to be what she needed. Roan had spent so many decades as a single male, only having relationships occasionally and none of them serious. He had no idea how he’d balance his life with a romantic attachment. All he knew was that the very idea of her hurt or in danger made his blood boil. Her willingness to do anything she needed to for her friends was admirable, but it also felt like someone was carving pieces out of his soul. He wanted to protect her, shield her, keep the world from ever touching her—and at the same time, he wanted to let her run wild and watch her burn through life, just to see what she’d do next.

He didn’t know how to say any of this. Didn’t know if he even should. Maybe it was better if she never knew. Maybe it would be safer for both of them.

But as he listened to her soft breathing in the dark, Roan made himself a silent promise—one that felt bigger than words, older than blood.

He would get them both out. Or die trying. Because Maddie wasn’t just the Nushawani. She was his.

And he was hers, whether she knew it or not.

Chapter One

“Some sort of horny spirit has taken over my body. That’s the only explanation for this newfound, all-consuming, desire pulsing through my body like jolts of electricity. Spirit hussy is about to make me make a fool of myself.” ~Katy

There were a lot of things Katy had expected to feel after defeating a snake-shifting tyrant, stopping a blood-magic ritual, and—oh yeah—officially mating with Gage in a way that involved teeth, claws, and a very enthusiastic lack of clothing.

She hadn’t expected to feel like her skin was too tight. Or that her brain had been replaced by a hamster wheel that only ran on worry and hormones.

Gage’s cabin near the Kingdom of Fangs compound was the kind of place she’d once dreamed about when she was a kid—a single story tucked under towering pines, with a porch swing that creaked comfortingly and a fireplace that always smelled faintly of cedar and ash. Something far from the hustle and bustle of New York. Otto had already claimed the battered recliner as his own. He’d thrown a blanket over his lap and was now pretending to read a book while he watched her and Gage with the kind of sidelong amusement that made her want to throw something at his head.

But most of Katy’s attention—okay, all of it—was on Gage. He moved around the kitchen like he belonged there, barefoot and shirtless, hair still damp from his morning shower, his wolf mark standing out sharp against the tan skin of his shoulder. Every time he glanced her way, her heart did this weird, swooping thing that made her want to either tackle him or run for the hills.

She hadn’t meant for things to get weird. But ever since last night—after, well, after—she couldn’t seem to get enough of him. Touching him. Smelling him. Just being near him. It was like she’d swallowed a sun and the heat had gone straight to her insides.

And now she was sitting at the kitchen table, staring at her hands, trying to pretend she hadn’t just spent the last thirty minutes fantasizing about dragging Gage back to bed. Or the floor. Or the porch swing.

She was a mess.

Otto cleared his throat in that deliberately annoying way that only he could pull off. “You looks like you want to bite. You creepsing.”

Katy shot him a glare. “You’re one to talk, bug eyes. If anyone is creepsing, it’s you with your big yellow eyes watching my every move.”

He grinned, totally unbothered. “Katy amusing me. And you stinksing.”

She opened her mouth to fire back, but Gage beat her to it. “Otto, if you value your life, you’ll find somewhere else to be.”

Otto held up his hands in surrender, but the smirk didn’t leave his face. “Okay, okay. I chops the woods. Or, chase squirrels. No bite,” he said, pointing a clawed finger at him and then Katy.

“I can bite whom I want,” Katy growled. “What you should do is take an online grammar class.”

Just before the door banged shut behind him, Otto muttered loudly enough for Katy to hear, “You online grammar butts.”

“That doesn’t even make sense,” she hollered back. Then there was just silence, and the beat of her heart in her chest, reverberating up her throat.

Katy stared at the table. It was scratched and worn, the kind of surface that had seen a lot of life. She wondered if she was going to leave a mark here, too. If she’d ever feel like she belonged in this space, or if she’d always be an outsider—too human, too much of everything, and yet not enough of anything. Now she was beginning to sound like Otto and not making a lick of sense. He was rubbing off on her.

Gage slid into the chair next to her, his knee bumping hers under the table. The heat that had been simmering in her chest jumped to a full boil. She pressed her thighs together, mortified at how needy she felt. She wanted to crawl into a hole that also had some sort of barrier that would keep him from feeling her emotions, knowing that she was a horn dog. Was this normal? Was she broken?

“Hey,” Gage said, his voice all low and gentle. “You okay?” There was no glint of humor in his eyes or teasing in his tone. He was genuinely concerned.

She nodded too quickly. “Fine. Totally fine. Why wouldn’t I be fine?” She tried for a laugh, but it came out sounding strangled.

He watched her for a long moment, those green wolf eyes seeing way too much. “You’re worried about Maddie.”

She latched onto that excuse like a lifeline. “Abso-freaking-lutely. She hasn’t checked in, and Roan’s not answering. What if something happened to them? What if—”

Gage reached over and took her hand, his thumb tracing slow circles over her pulse point. The contact sent a jolt through her that had nothing to do with anxiety and everything to do with the fact that she’d apparently turned into a hussy overnight. “They’re tough. Maddie’s stronger than she thinks. And Roan’s too stubborn to die. Not to mention, judging on his behavior around her, he’s laid claim to her and won’t let anything happen to her.”

Katy tried to focus on his words, but all she could think about was the way his thumb felt against her skin. Her breath hitched, and Gage’s lips curled just a little at the corners.

She yanked her hand away, cheeks burning, as she rubbed them up and down the tops of her thighs. “While those statements are all true–except for the one about him wanting her. He acts like she gets on his last nerve–I still don’t like the fact that we haven’t heard anything from them.”

Gage watched her quietly for what felt like five minutes, though it was probably all of one. He arched an eyebrow. “Did I do something wrong?”

She wanted to say yes. She wanted to yell at him for making her feel this way, for not explaining what was happening to her body, for being so damn patient, seeming completely unaffected, when all she wanted was to crawl into his lap and never leave. Katy also wanted to ask why he was bothering to ask when he could no doubt feel all of the emotions rolling off of her, not to mention scent exactly what her body was hungering for. Plot twist—it’s not chocolate.

Instead, she blurted, “Is this normal?”

He blinked. “Is what normal?”

She waved her hands, flustered. “This! Me. Wanting to—never mind.” Gah. Why was she struggling with just speaking up? Katy wasn’t usually one to get flustered or out of sorts. Usually, she was comfortable in her own skin and spoke her mind quite articulately. But after one night in Gage’s bed, she’d devolved into a blubbering ignoramus with no self confidence.

Gage leaned in, his voice dropping to a dangerous rumble. “Wanting to what, Katy?” Again, there was nothing playful in his tone. He was deadly serious, and by the command in his voice, he expected an answer.

She bit her lip. “You know. You.”

His eyes darkened, and for a second she saw a flash of wolf—hungry, possessive, fiercely protective. “Yeah, it’s normal. You’re my mate, remember?”

She groaned and dropped her head to the table. Katy considered banging it over and over until maybe she knocked herself out. But that felt a bit dramatic. “I’m your mate, yes. And I’m attracted to you. But this is like feral, unnatural, unhealthy, unhinged, and any other words that begin with ‘un’ that make sense in my description. What I’m experiencing cannot be good for me. I feel like a dog in heat.”

His laughter rumbled through the room, warm and wicked. “That’s because you kind of are.”

Lifting her head, she shot him a look. “You were getting points for being so sensitive about the topic until just then,” she pointed at him. “Now I’m removing said points and you’re back at zero. Go into the negative and you’ll be the one panting from lack of gratification.”

He grinned, all teeth and trouble. “First,” he held up a finger, “using sex as a weapon or form of punishment on me will always end badly for you. Second,” another finger went up, “if you think I’m not already panting for lack of gratification, as you put it, then you’re not paying attention.” He tapped his nose. “And third, you’ll get used to it.”

She stared at him, her mouth dropping open as she blinked, attempting to work through all the words he just said. He had a point that she shouldn’t use sex as a weapon. That was just immature and cruel. However, he shouldn’t tease her about something that was obviously distressing to her. “I apologize about the threat. I’d appreciate it if you’d be less flippant about how this is making me feel. I don’t want to get used to it. I want to be normal. I want to be able to have a conversation with you without wanting to engage in endless coitus that would most likely kill us both eventually.”

“Sounds like a great way to die.” Gage’s hand slipped under her hair, cupping the back of her neck. “I like you this way. You smell positively edible. Your skin is glowing, your eyes are vibrant, your cheeks are flushed. And when you look at me, it makes me want to do wicked, wicked things to you. And I will, whenever you want or need. You don’t have to be embarrassed, Katy. Wolves are very affectionate creatures. Touch is not just a need, it’s a want. And I have been touch-starved for a very long time. I’ve been trying to give you time to adjust. But please know, this is what being mated feels like. The pull, the need. It’ll settle. Eventually.”

She looked up at him through the curtain of hair that had fallen forward, partially blocking her face. “And until then?”

He shrugged, casual, but his eyes were hot. “We deal. Together. You need me, then tell me. And I will do the same. Denying the feelings only makes them stronger.”

Katy sighed and let herself relax into his touch, even as her mind spun with questions. Was this really her life now? How long was she going to feel like she was about to jump out of her skin if she couldn’t get her hands on Gage?

She thought about Maddie, about how her best friend would probably make some crack about her being a walking cautionary tale, and she felt a pang of longing so sharp it hurt. She hoped Maddie was okay. She hoped Roan was being his usual grumpy, overprotective self and not getting them into trouble. Then she couldn’t help but wonder if Lola was going through something similar, or if she had gone through something similar. She might not be a wolf, but she was still part animal.

The door opened and Otto came back in, arms full of firewood. He shot them a look that was half amusement, half exasperation. “We not need the wood in winters if two you keeps making its hot.”

Katy flipped him off without looking up. Gage just grinned.

They settled into an uneasy routine for the day—Gage cooking breakfast, Otto making sarcastic comments, Katy trying to keep herself from crawling over the table and into Gage’s lap. Every time he touched her, even accidentally, it was like a spark that ran all over her body and made her heart beat race and her stomach dip in delicious ways. She was embarrassed by how much she wanted him, but even more embarrassed by how little control she seemed to have.

By midday, Katy had convinced herself she was losing her mind. She’d snapped at Otto, burned the toast, and nearly started crying when Gage brushed her hair back from her face. She was officially a mess.

Gage must have decided he’d had enough. He came over, cupped her face in his hands, and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Come on. You need to meet Nox and his mate, Everly. If I don’t take you, they’ll come here, and that will piss me off.”

“Everything pisses you off,” Katy pointed out.

“Not everything,” he winked at her.

Otto perked up. “Trip in the field?”

“It’s called a field trip, you lizard Neanderthal, and you’re lucky I love you,” Katy said as she knelt down and tapped his nose affectionately.

Gage shot him a look. “Stay here. Guard the place. And try not to burn it down.”

Otto saluted with two fingers and flopped back into the recliner. “Finally the peaces and quiets.”

Katy followed Gage out the door, grateful for the change of scenery. It was a testament to how messed up her mind was that she wasn’t even thinking about being nervous to meet the alpha of the Kingdom of Fangs and his mate. Instead, she was thinking of every obscure word in her vocabulary to keep her more lascivious thoughts at bay; apricity, petrichor, susurrus. Gage opened the door to his black truck. Once she was seated, he reached across her to buckle the seat belt. Her breath caught as his scent bombarded her, and the slight scruff of his jaw grazed her cheek.

“I can buckle myself in, Dire,” she said with a bite in her tone.

“I’ve no doubt you can, mate,” he said with a sly grin. “However, I like to make sure you’re nice and safe. Precious cargo, ya know?” He closed the door before she could respond to his sweet, albeit flirty, comment.

As they drove, Gage rested his hand on her thigh while Katy kept her arms tightly folded against her chest. For some reason, she felt this existential need to maintain control of her urges. Katy was sure that if she gave in to touching him, she might never stop. Pretty sure that could get all kinds of awkward in public situations. She couldn’t even look at him. Her eyes took in the surrounding scenery, the lush green forest and deep brown bark of the trees. It was beautiful. And so very different from the concrete jungle she came from.

When they reached Nox’s house, Katy’s nerves kicked into high gear. Nox was an alpha male, dominant like her own mate. Considering Gage had been a bit of an ass when she’d met him, she wondered if Nox would be an ass, too. Did that just go hand in hand with dominance? Guess she’d find out. She took a deep breath and pushed her worries aside. Katy wanted to make a good impression, though considering the wolf’s superior senses, it would be quite obvious to Nox and his mate what she was dealing with.

“Somebody kill me now and just put me out of my complete and utter abashment,” she muttered under her breath before her door opened and she slipped out. Katy ignored her mate’s outstretched hand. “No touching,” she said, attempting to keep the bite out of her tone, and failing miserably.

Irritation fluttered across his face as he narrowed his eyes at her. She knew Gage would never hurt her, no matter how much she’d no doubt frustrate him. She also knew that he didn’t appreciate her denying him anything, which was why he simply snatched her hand and entwined their fingers. He tugged her close to his body until their shoulders brushed as they walked toward the massive front doors of the beautiful home.

“You can touch me whenever you want or need to,” he said, his voice low. “I expect you to extend me the same courtesy.” The words weren’t said in a cruel tone, but he sure as hell wasn’t tiptoeing around her feelings. Not that Gage would ever tiptoe in any capacity, figuratively or literally.

They barely made it through the door before a beautiful woman swept Katy into a hug. “It is so good to finally meet you,” she said in a warm, raspy voice. “I was sure Gage would keep you all to himself.” When she stepped back from Katy, Everly looked at Gage. “Which would be all kinds of wrong because she’s new to this and you’re not the only one who can give her guidance.”

Katy could practically feel Gage’s hackles rise. “I can take care of my mate.” His voice dropped into that low, less than friendly tone.

“I didn’t say you couldn’t,” the woman said, her chin lifted high and her posture dripping with confidence. “But one way to take care of your mate is to make sure every need is met, including the need for her to have females to talk to about her new circumstances.”

That seemed to shut her mate up.

“I’m Everly,” the alpha female turned her warm, brown eyes back on Katy. She had long, shiny, brunette hair, cheekbones most women would pay for, and full lips that gave her a bit of a pouty look. She was stunning and tall, though Katy was quite short, so everyone was tall to her, but she thought Everly was above the normal height for a woman.

“It’s very nice to meet you,” Katy said, one hand still held tightly in Gage’s and the other slipped into her back pocket as she rocked back on her heels. “Thank you for the warm salutation.”

Everly’s brow rose as her lips tipped up slightly. “Salutation?”

Katy shrugged. “I like words. The less commonly used in everyday conversation, the better. Also, it usually helps calm my nerves. Although right now, I don’t think even a bottle of whiskey would help.”

“I’m sure we could find you a glass,” Everly offered.

“No alcohol,” Gage interrupted. “She’s not even legal.”

Katy glanced up at him, her lips pursing briefly. “Anyone ever tell you you’re a killjoy?”

“Only every chance I get,” a deep voice said from behind them.

Katy turned to see two men walking into the room from a hallway. One was young, maybe a little older than her, while the other seemed to be closer to his forties. Both were incredibly handsome and walked with an air of authority.

“Justice,” the older male growled. “I’ve told you one of these days he’s going to challenge you just to kick your ass, and I’m not going to step in.”

The younger one, Justice, simply grinned and then looked at her and winked. “I’m up for a good fight. Especially if it puts a smile on this beauty.”

The older man sighed. “Hello, Katy,” he held out a hand to her. “I’m Nox, the alpha of Kingdom of Fangs and mate to this beauty.” He motioned to his mate. “This is Justice, my beta.”

“For now,” Gage muttered. “Hope you have a backup.”

Katy looked up at him. His face was blank, unreadable as he looked at Justice with complete indifference. As if the male wasn’t even worthy of his attention. But Katy could feel his irritation and jealousy. She nearly rolled her eyes. Did he honestly think anyone else could turn her head? Especially with the pheromones she’d been throwing off like Halloween candy?